Jessica, Second Series, Part One, The Joys of Sex

To expand on that, "I'm listening" was Harold's response to Bakuto's proposal as well. These scenes are almost mirrors, with a Hand agent seeking cooperation with a Meachum after failing to recruit Danny directly. I think it has more to do with their father. Ward was constantly under his thumb. He couldn't live his life how he wanted and was pressured into his role by a manipulative man. Joy was the prodigal daughter.

She learned her role without guidance from Harold. When she found out he was still alive that bond was great. She loved her dad. Then the revelation about him shook her world. Whereas Ward could suddenly be the man he wanted to be, a good man, Joy's look on life was shattered somewhat. She's in turmoil and IMO easy to manipulate. Life was good for her before Danny, and if she's convinced that Danny died on the mountain and that this isn't really Danny, she can justify her revenge on him. She's not above doing brutal things to get what she wants.

Even if she feels bad about it after. She really is her father's daughter. Ward I feel was a product of his situation.

Except that the previous scene we saw Joy she was defending Danny to Harold and basically turned away from Harold because she realised that he was framing Danny. We didn't even see her react to his death. There was also a scene where she says, "Information is power, you're the one who taught me that," to Harold. It was very confusing for me, too. I got the impression that Madame Gao was somehow influencing her. I felt Gao being there behind the two of them just to listen in was a bit nonsensical, so her attempting to manipulate Joy into joining Davos's plot the two of them being the closest people to Danny is the theory I'm going with.

Well from the IF comic, Im pretty sure that Davos and Gao are working together or have been working together. There is no way that intelligent woman would be gunning for Danny when she loved him as much as was established. It's interesting that Ward ended up making peace with Danny and Joy is going down Harold's path, but I was also thrown off a bit. Guess we'll have to wait if she makes the same descent into manipulation. She probably wanted to meet one of Danny's friend and all of a sudden he started talking about killing him.

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Nine presenter Jessica Braithwaite's baby joy: 'We proved the doctors wrong'

The writing was serving some season two nonsense Im not sure Davos is going by the monk playbook regardless. She was loyal to her fathers memory. Neither was Wards good guy turn Buck did a really really bad job. Davos also mentions that Kun Lun is the order of the Crane Mother in the show Incidentally he came to all of my plays when I was a teenager so drunk he could barely walk.

Later after the DUIs he always left right afterwards so he could get back home to his fridge full of beer. He was always proud, and he always let me know that. But I never became more important than drinking. All that to say, there were some deep reasons why I felt driven in my creative life. And those reasons fell away as my attachment to self dissolved. I let go of that whole life. I gave in to the death of that part of me. And I was happy for a while.

Just meditating, teaching meditation, going on meditation retreats, listening to talks on meditation, meditating while eating, driving, and shaving my legs. I suffered less and less and my life was filled with a peaceful happiness. It also started to get a bit, well, boring. Then something really cool started to happen. I began to ache to perform and create. I wanted something new and fresh and alive. This desire to make art was coming from something much greater than a tiny part of me that wanted approval and admiration.

I was finally humble enough to learn thanks to all the meditation. I took writing classes and entered a three-year acting program that kicked my butt and turned me on to no end. I also helped produce a short film that went on to have a successful festival run and online release. During this time I started to come up against some old wounds around my creativity. Some days I did. I felt very stunted and limited. While I continue to support others in their projects, at that time it was a way to stay small and keep my own visions in a box.

My partner was and is very free in his creativity, and by contrast I felt like I was in a cage of bad memories and old beliefs. I would watch him booking roles, writing scripts, painting massive abstract works, translating ancient poetry and feel like I would never be able to express myself so freely and with such skill and beauty. One day we were driving around and I was telling him how much I wanted to express myself creatively and how I still felt stuck.

I figured, why not? So I added that to my daily meditation practice and all the other things we do to heal and I set an intention. I was willing to take it one day at a time. I wrote a lot, meditated a lot, went to my classes, and told my friends and community of my intention.

I also rearranged my teaching a bit. Instead of teaching most days, I only spent half the week focused on my new love, teaching meditation. That way I could dedicate the other half of my time to my first love, art. I guess you could say that I began a polyamorous relationship with spirituality and creativity. And—surprise, surprise—came to know that there is no separation between the two. It was only my mind that wanted to draw that line.

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That was only a few short years ago. It astonishes me to see what has happened in that time. I made a short film and feature film both as an actor and producer, got cast in several projects, started writing for multiple online magazines in addition to Deconstructing Yourself, got a book deal, and grew my teaching in a lovely way. It can feel a little magical to me, but when I look back I see that it has been a long road of hard work and lots of support from others. This new relationship with my creative life has actually provided more awesome opportunities than I ever could have imagined before.

I am now able to hang on loosely to my creative work, which of course makes me better at my crafts.

[Iron Fist Spoilers] Joy in the last episode : Defenders

I get to inhabit my creativity fully, without the filter of who I think I am. This is something I have always wanted to do, but never thought I could do. I thought to be a director you had to have vision and who did I think I was to step into that role. But through this process of rediscovering my creativity I realized who am I not to step into that role.

And so I did. I loved every moment of it. I also found that I have my own cheerleaders, people who truly want to support me in my creative evolution. All these years of meditation, and inner work, cleared the way for me to expand creatively. Even better, I get to keep expanding and evolving. At this point in my life I am fully embracing and lavishing in the wonder of creativity and art. Making a film, or writing this article is my way to continue the age-old tradition of telling stories, my way to engage with my humanity.

Coming out of my generally stress-free life to make a film is completely worth it. The tension in my shoulders that my partner has been massaging away all week is worth it. The sleepless nights before the shoot are worth it. The joy of the process greatly outweighs the pain. And meditation keeps that pain from becoming suffering. So why not go for it? Meditation shows us that life can be a bit cyclical. We feel good, we feel bad, we feel good, we feel bad, we feel neutral, we feel bad, we feel good… and so on.

Meditate for a while and this insight will hit you like a sock full of quarter rolls. Yes, it can be a bit painful to see that you are in the Matrix with no hope for escape.

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You may know that your thoughts and emotions are as empty as my bank account after making a film. You may not suffer anymore, or at least rarely. After that, I have no clue what happens. So, I say why not have a good time while you are here?

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What better way to do that than to create art? Make the most of the monotony. Choose to make meaning and engage with life. Do what you enjoy. Express what only you can express. If your spiritual practice had stripped you of your desire to create art, trust that your creativity will return. When it does it will be washed clean. No longer cloudy with fear or marred with the need for approval. Instead your creativity will come from a place that words can not describe. This new arising of artistic expression will tear you apart in the most beautiful ways, as it heals and nourishes you.

You will find that when you create art you are of service to something much greater than just a small grasping self. In fact you may begin to realize that your creativity comes from something that transcends self all together. Rather your awakenings will only clarify and deepen your creativity. Let me say that again. Your spiritual practice will set the artist in you free.

No longer bound to your past or some cookie cutter image of success, you will thrive and blossom. It will probably take time and hard work, but do not give up. The world needs you. You are so tiny and insignificant, and so very unique and vital. Hold space for both of those truths and go make some art! We never know where our creativity will take us. This article was going to be a list of tips for mindful movie making, and this came out instead.

Let your art and your spirituality surprise you. The adventure will just keep unfolding, if we like it or not, so get on the ride and enjoy. When I was fourteen I decided it was high time to lose my virginity. It happened in the backseat of a hot rod car— I think it was a green Chevelle—with an eighteen-year-old with tattoos and a ponytail.

I kept my turquoise All-Star high tops on the whole time. I had never even made out with anyone before. Later that year I had sex again; this time in a field with a twenty-year-old with a ponytail. I was also intoxicated again. This pattern went on for many years. Not always with older men with ponytails. Not always with men. What remained the same was my inability to really be conscious for sexual experiences.

I was checked out in some way. It was all about checking out and getting off; sex without presence or intimacy. When I started meditating I was still very disconnected from my sexuality. I had begun to recognize that thoughts and emotions were not as solid as I thought. Never going to happen. I preferred to squeeze my eyes shut, turn my head away, and if possible hide under a pillow. I was also cut off from my body. I had no idea how good sex could actually be. I was only partially present for my partners because I was only partially present for myself.

I tend to attract people who match me with where I am in my emotional and spiritual evolution. So no one ever called me out on the fact that I disappeared during sex. My meditation practice, however, did not miss that fact. When you spend time working on waking up, it gets harder and harder to go unconscious. By observing thoughts and emotions every day in formal meditation, my practice was revealing the parts of me that were hidden away. My authentic sexuality was bursting forth. After one of my first retreats I realized that I wanted my sexuality to be included in my spiritual practice.

I wanted to open my eyes. I wanted to really feel all of it. It was also obvious that, of course, this is the way it should be. I began to have very profound spiritual experiences during sex. It was a meditation in action that I had never known. As a result my creative life began to expand too. I found that I had more energy to write, act, draw and play. My sexual and creative nature began to blossom in a beautiful way.

It became impossible to be cut off from such an important part of my experience. Meditation was giving me freedom from my mind and access to my body in a way that I had never known. I recognized that the potential for richness, connection, and satisfaction were limitless. A whole new world was opening up, which was very exciting. And my relationships benefitted. I was no longer hiding from my partner. I was present, vulnerable, and open. My body became incredibly sensitive. It was like how some people describe certain drug experiences, but without the drugs.

With this greater connection to my own body I connected with my partner on a much deeper level. What it is possible to share with another person continues to shock and delight me. Mindful Sex can be dirty, fun, exciting and rough. It can be based on who I am in that moment. I have stumbled on a poultry aisle of matt-finish genitals right beside the ringbinders. It is only three days before the main event and the warehouse is thrumming with activity. At one point, I nearly fall over a trolley of blow-up dolls: This is the enduring appeal of shows such as this — watching people not so unlike ourselves, doing something extraordinary.

We know that couples who use sex toys have better relationships, have more sex and enjoy sex more. His words are ringing in my ears as I stand in the warehouse, my hands gripped around the rim of my very own trolley. And so I find myself, for the next 10 minutes, strolling up and down shelves heaving with goods, throwing chocolate body paint and Kama Sutra playing cards into the trolley. Everyone around me is friendly, chatting, swapping pleasantries and dancing to the stereo.