Twisted Fairy Tales 3: Jack and the Beanstalk

What will you give me if I let you take a peek:? But I sure would like to see what you got in that bag. You look like a likely lad, so I'll let you look for free. The only ones of their kind. The person who has these beans owns a fortune.

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But I only have this pet cow I'm taking to market to sell for some food for me and my poor old mother. You need go no farther to seek your fortune.

I'll tell you what. I'll save you a trip to market and take that nice-looking cow off your hands in exchange for these marvelous beans. Those valuable beans so beautiful to behold would warm the cockles of his mother's heart and buy for them the riches they had despaired of ever obtaining.

No more cold gruel for them! And he could buy the Asteroids game he had always wanted.

Shoot for the sky he had always thought. One had to take a chance on snake oil now and then. Jack waved good-by and shouted after him, "Hey, Pops, I forgot to tell you something. She don't give any milk. As he rushed through the door, his mother who had been playing solitaire at the kitchen table looked up and said, "You're sure back quick, boy.

What brings you home so soon? Give me the cash. How much did you get for Nellie? Ma, look at these magic beans. You're just like your father!

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Jack stood sheepishly while his mother worked through her fit and then said, "How do you think I feel, Mother? They both went to bed hungry that night, not knowing what they would do the next morning, but Jack snored contentedly after a while, thinking he would go look for the old man and the cow in the morning. He awoke the next morning eager to start on his journey, although a little bit weak and spindly on the legs from lack of food.

He was just giving himself a big stretch and starting to do his morning jumping-jacks, when he saw the large trunk of a beanstalk through the window. He rubbed his eyes and went to examine the large leaves twining their way up the side of the house. He craned his neck up to the sky and, lo and behold, he could not see the top of the stalk; it faded into the clouds. Then and there Jack decided to climb that beanstalk. He would get to the top of the stalk if it were the last thing he ever did. He was just beginning to ascend when his mother peered her ugly head out of the window and yelled at him, "Stop, Jack.

Get down here this minute! You'll break every bone in your body and who will pay your doctor bills? I'm going out in the world to seek my fortune. Higher and higher Jack climbed until he alighted on a cloud. In the misty distance he could see the castle. Now if I'm not mistaken, there should be a grisly old one-eyed giant in that castle. All I have to do is slip unseen into his counting house and snatch his golden guineas away. To think I had to search the world over for someone more dull-witted than me!

He raised the handle, but before he could rap three times an old hag answered the door and croaked, "Come right in, Jack, we've been expecting you for two hundred years now.

The oven is nice and hot and Jules the Giant should be in from his morning stomp shortly. Noddy Goes to Toyland. Hurrah for Little Noddy. Are We Nearly There Yet? Hannah McBride and Alex Perkins. Victoria, Cat and the bag of holes. What Mutley Did Next. Riddle and the Golden Fiddel. Twisted Fairy Tales 1: Little Red Riding Hood. Twisted Fairy Tales 2: The Three Little Pigs.

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