Change is a Celebration - Approaching Uncertainty with Confidence and a Positive Attitude

There are 48 questions within this assessment. It should take you minutes to complete. By purchasing this book, you can also download both the e-book and the audio versions for free. Three for the price of one! Self-Awareness Without self-awareness leadership becomes just another exercise in ego gratification. Self-awareness allows for self-discipline and control of the ego.

Without it the ego runs amok looking after itself and only incidentally in the service of others if the needs of both happen to align. Self-awareness is the ability to see when an emotion or a perception is influencing your thinking and behavior and, if necessary, do something about it. Gaining control over the state of your mind will pay big dividends in terms of your leadership effectiveness. It is the blind spot of leadership. Being able to step back and see both the positive and negative aspects about yourself, to see how you affect others, and to see how you are behaving in real-time , is critical to your success as a leader.

Self-awareness is a bigger problem than one might think. This means that two thirds of us are typically controlled by our emotions and are not yet skilled at spotting them and using them to our benefit. You can not manage the behaviors of others without first getting a handle on your own. An Apollo 11 Lesson. In The Next Level , Scott Eblin cites research that finds that 40 percent of new executives fail within eighteen months of their promotion.

What begins as one of the best moments in your career can turn out to be one of the most stressful events of your life. With a new role comes a new set of expectations requiring a new set of competencies. Part of the problem faced by newly promoted executives is that while the expectations are high, they are not clearly stated.

Eblin has defined nine set of key behaviors and beliefs that new executives need to pick up and let go of to succeed. There is no arguing the fact that we all have various combinations of strengths in varying degrees. Maximizing the use of those strengths as we can, in the context we find ourselves in is advantageous to all involved. You may need to develop a new strength and turn some of your weaknesses around. Then there is the question of whether or not your particular brand of strength is marketable. Great hobby, but not a career at least not at my current level of competence.

Robert Kaiser has assembled fifteen authors in The Perils of Accentuating the Positive to help you get some perspective on the strengths movement. They bring out four ways to look at strengths: What comes naturally to you Competitive Strengths: Skills that are stronger than most of your competitors Distinctively Competitive Strengths: Strengths that distinguish you from others Competitive and Aligned Strengths: Strengths you need for long-term career success If you plan to succeed by focusing on your strengths, make sure you do more than just discover and build on your strengths your personal best.

You will also need your strengths to stand out compared to your peers competitive strengths. If you want to stand out among your peers and have a better chance for promotions, make sure your strengths set you apart from other also competitive peers distinctively competitive strengths. Finally, you better hope that your five distinctive and competitive strengths include the ones that make a difference when it comes to long-term career success competitive and aligned strengths.

We regularly tell the up-and-coming youngies to first discover their strengths, then gauge how those strengths compare to those of the people they are and will be, competing with, and finally, find out which strengths they need to fulfill their career dreams and to start working on the ones that are not up to par. As we have stated here before, the overuse of a strength can be a weakness. When we rely too much on our strengths we usually end up emphasizing them to the point where they become weaknesses and derail our career and relationships.

Leading Blog Main Page Leading Matters is about the journey. The stories he tells here are revolve around the ten elements that shaped his journey and how he relied on these traits in pivotal moments. The elements are relevant to any leader at any level. As he observes, the higher up you go the crises just get bigger and come faster. He begins by discussing the foundational elements: He then links them together with courage. Finally, he shows how collaboration, innovation, intellectual curiosity, storytelling, and creating change that lasts, helped him reach his goals.

Here are some of his thoughts on each element extracted from his stories: Arrogance sees only strengths, ignores our weaknesses, and overlooks the strengths of others, therefore leaving us vulnerable to catastrophic mistakes. Authenticity and Trust Authenticity is essential to building trust. Consider the wisdom popularly attributed to Socrates: So this is part of the practice: If you take a leadership role as a step toward a personal goal of gathering ever-greater titles, awards, and salaries, you will never see true success in that role.

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Recognize the service of others. As a leader it is easy to get wrapped up in big projects and ambitious initiatives, and, in the process, to forget the smaller, but no less important, individual acts of service taking place all around you. Much of that service supports and enables the widely celebrated success of others. Empathy Empathy should always be a factor in making decisions and setting goals.

Empathy represents a crucial check on action—placing a deep understanding of and concern for the human condition next to data can lead to decisions that support the wellbeing of all. Empathy usually implies compassion and perhaps charity, but we are looking for more than that: Courage, on the other hand, compels a leader to take that right action.

While many people can discern what is right and true, acting on that discernment is more difficult. Even if risk-taking is against your nature, for the good of your organization, you must find the courage to practice it. Collaboration and Teamwork Most significant endeavors will be accomplished by a team.

Certain ground rules circumvented interteam rivalries. First of all, I reminded everyone of our shared goal: Further, to support innovative, cross-disciplinary thinking, I set a second ground rule: To this, I added a third ground rule: This led to my final ground rule: Innovation presents great opportunities for smart entrepreneurs, not the other way around. Intellectual Curiosity Beyond personal enjoyment, though, this lifelong curiosity has served me well in my career. It has enabled me to engage in meaningful dialog about the world and its future.

In challenging moments, great leaders show their true character. Storytelling If you really want to inspire a team to action, best to engage them with a story. Once they become receptive—once they can imagine themselves as part of your vision—you can back your story up with facts and figures.

When you turn that dream into a vivid story, you make it so attractive and so real that people will want to share it with you by joining your team.

When it came time to respond to change, these companies moved quickly and efficiently, because every employee already understood the company identity and therefore knew how to respond without direct coaching. In every profession and career, as we climb to higher leadership positions, the role of facts and data decreases. Legacy means the institution serves people more effectively now than it did when you arrived. Any one of them has the potential to derail even the best of leaders. While they may creep up on us, we can see them coming and apply the proper antidote.

And even though these seven challenges never really go away, we can create some life habits that keep them at bay. Nieuwhof writes from a been-there-done-that Christian perspective about the issues as they manifest themselves in our lives and follows up each one with a chapter on how to combat it.

These issues affect everyone and some you'll find hit close to home. The seven challenges are: Cynicism Disappointment and frustration often end in cynicism. Ask them and they know all about it. It may get us in the door, but character is what determines how far we go. Technology just makes it worse. Eliminate hurry from your life. And this comment could pull any of us up short: For me, the sense that a conversation is going nowhere always carries with it an underpinning of judgment and even arrogance on my part.

Which, of course, should drive me right back to my knees in confession. Irrelevance Irrelevance happens when what you do no longer connects to the culture and the people around you. That gap is a factor of how fast things change relative to you.

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Change staves off irrelevance. Get radical about change. Surround yourself with younger people. Seek change to transform you. Burnout Burnout saps the meaning and wonder out of life. Signs of burnout include among other things: Getting out of this state begins by admitting it and then figuring out how to live today so you will thrive tomorrow. What does that look like? Nieuwhof recommends some concrete steps you can take to bring you back from burnout. Go deep enough and take enough time to recover so that you begin to feel gratitude for the process. Emptiness Ironically, success often makes you feel empty.

Humility will win you what pride never will: Other people naturally gravitate toward people who live for a cause beyond themselves. The practical advice found here will benefit anyone on their leadership journey. It does not invalidate everything else of its type, rather it is designed to be simpler and thereby memorable and actionable on issues that really matter for people in the work environment.

And it is quite straightforward for both accessing yourself and others you work with. Using the key sticking points between people, they identify 4 Working Styles: Pioneers value possibilities and they spark energy and imagination. Drivers value challenge and they generate momentum. Integrators value connection and they draw teams together. Guardians value stability and they bring order and rigor. The authors naturally go into detail on each of these types and give an example of a well-known person that fits that type.

They also delve into difference between the types as they relate to stress Pioneers are the least stressed. The trick of course, is to use this knowledge to modify you own behavior. Then you can determine how you might flex your own style to better match the preferences of those around you. Knowing these trigger points can help you as a leader to give people more of what they need to excel and less of what will turn them off. I might want to be direct with others but I have learned that I am more productive when I am diplomatic.

But being that that is my natural tendency, I probably prefer when people are direct and concise with me. That fact would affect my working style profile. They prefer having all of the answers and enjoy zooming into every detail. They grew up in a different time and may have adopted a more novelty-seeking and relationship—focused orientation. Without it we tend to be reactive, disengaged, an unimaginative. The more conscious we are, the faster we adapt, and the higher performing we become.

The Power of Awareness in Business and Life , because they believe that becoming more conscious is critical in our increasingly disruptive and accelerating world. This sabotages our ability to thrive in a constantly changing world. There are four reasons why we are not aware as we need to be: As a result, we stay stuck, biased, and reactive. Staying small and never stepping up is sure to lead to regrets and will undermine your highest potential. Go Deep Harness the power of introspection by getting to know who you are, where you come from, and why you act the way you do.

Think Big Get curious and adaptive: Get Real Become more honest and intentional in leadership and life, overcoming the pitfalls of being too safe and cautious while embracing reality. Step Up Act boldly and responsibly to reach your highest potential: To lead change you need a conscious mindset. That requires that we become more conscious of what pushes us forward—our Accelerators —and what holds us back—our Hijackers. Accelerators like courage, drive or determination, deliberate practice, resilience, and vulnerability, drive us forward. Hijackers like self-criticism, cynicism, controlling behavior, aloofness or disengagement, and hyper-competitiveness, hold us back.

It is important to know how these things impact your performance and constructively use them or deal with them. There are many things that conspire to throw us off-course. Knowing who you want to be in the world and remembering your purpose, will help you to manage these issues and keep you on course. The more conscious we are the less drama we will experience in our lives. Another consequence of being conscious is to be civil.

Acts of civility are the small sacrifices we make for the good of all and the sake of harmoniously living and working together. Barack Obama because "he's an Arab. He's a decent, family man, citizen that I just happen to have disagreements with on fundamental issues. Consciousness is a choice. Conscious unleashes our full potential as human beings. By expanding our minds, enriching our experiences, and shaping our destinies, we discover our purpose in life. Being conscious enables us to approach life as a journey. Equipped with everything we need—an open mind and heart, confidence and resilience, and our capacity for greater consciousness—we embrace the uncertainty of life.

Conscious is the accelerator for effective change. If you are a high-performer, it comes with the territory. Graham offers 7 tips for overcoming Imposer Syndrome: Mistakes can indicate that you need to prioritize, delegate, or take a break. Or they could just be mistakes. Perhaps you attribute your success to luck. We are masters at believing negative feedback while shrugging off the positive.

Take time to listen to praise from others and own it. Stay humble and curious. It will give you unprecedented depth in this day and age. Beyond what I'm sharing here, Switchers is an invaluable resource for those looking to make a career switch. And this requires a different approach than the typical job search. She covers the five job search killers, networking and the 2nd Level Contact Strategy, rebranding your social media profile, and crafting your professional identity.

Bias is a reality in the hiring process, and can be an especially difficult hurdle for Switchers. Learn to identify it and engage strategies to overcome it such as using your network to become an insider. Your career story is what will convince the hiring manager to pull the trigger and make the offer. It should be logical, compelling, attention-getting, and genuine. You need to network to make a career switch. Second- and third level connections are where the action is! Most people in your immediate circle have the same information you do, so the goal is to get their network, because that is where your next opportunity lies.

How many working hours of the average day do you and your team spend in the Drama Triangle? This triangle was developed as a social model years ago by Stephen Karpman, a student of Dr. Eric Berne, the father of Transactional Analysis. It maps out a type of dysfunctional interaction that is common in the workplace and in our homes as well. Karpman used this triangle to define three points that arise predictably in any dysfunctional real-life drama: Notice that all three of these are roles we can choose to play, or choose to step back from , at any time.

Here are three ways you could choose to respond: One classic pattern is: How often do you really want to do that? The Drama Triangle is a game. A lot of the leaders we work with are shocked to learn that most of their workplace interactions fall within this dysfunctional triangle! Start noticing that that the Drama Triangle game typically begins with one person — it could be you — taking up the Persecutor or Victim role.

If not, could you think of anyone else we can get to help you out with it? Leave people enough time to readjust before the deadline. Your responsibility as a leader is to support your people, start good conversations, and make good outcomes possible. The Drama Triangle goes in the exact opposite direction of all three of those goals: The only way to win this particular game to resolve not to play — and then stick with that decision! He oversees the corporate direction and strategy for the company's global operations including sales, marketing, consulting, alliances, and support.

Under Mattson's leadership, the Sandler organization expanded domestically and internationally to over offices in 32 countries. For more information, please visit the Road to Excellence website. The Excellence Process consists of six steps that when taken in order and made part of your culture will turn excellence into a process and help to get rid of your blind spots.

He has curated ideas from 45 internationally—known doers and thinkers on the topics of entrepreneurship, innovation, and authentic leadership. But here are several that I found interesting my first time through the book: Startups Are Not a Smaller Version of a Large Company We know that a startup is a temporary organization designed to search for a repeatable and scalable business model. The corollary for an enterprise is as follows: A company is a permanent organization designed to execute a repeatable and scalable business model. Once you understand that existing companies are designed to execute, then you can see why they have a hard time with continuous and disruptive innovation.

It will happen especially in industries such as transportation, shipping, finance, and retail, but all kinds of companies and leaders should look into this much deeper. Of course, the big companies have an advantage due to the amount of data they often how. The startups lack this, and data is increasingly becoming king.

How to Anticipate the Future There are an amazing number of things we can accurately predict when we learn how to distinguish between what I call hard trends, trends that will happen, and soft trends, trends that might happen. Think of it as a two-sided coin. Agility is on one side, allowing you to react fast to unforeseen change, and the other side is anticipatory, allowing you to see what is coming and take action before the change occurs. Agility is basically reacting quickly to change. Agile innovation will keep you reacting to disruptive innovation created by others.

They are indeed timeless. Brian Dodd examines in Timeless Kindle what it takes to reach the top of your profession. How do you become the best at what you do? How do you become an Apex Leader? Dodd has selected the 10 key practices that Apex Leaders have in common. While character, patience and empathy are important for a leader to sustain their leadership, they are not necessarily the behaviors and practices needed to get to the top of their chosen profession.

Here, Dodd focuses on the achievement side of the equation. What is required to be the best at what you do? While Timeless will resonate with Christian leaders, the principles apply across all organizations and contexts. As readers of his blog have come to expect, Dodd draws on many examples from the world of sports. All of these principles are found in scripture and are being successfully applied by Apex Leaders in organizations of all types. Your team is your primary difference maker. Apex Leaders look for skill, work ethic and passion when building a team. Apex Leaders Are Humble Humble leaders do not deny their talents but are thankful for them.

Humble leaders acknowledge that no matter how good they are, they are in constant need of support. All successful leaders must be servant-leaders first. They acknowledge they have been granted opportunities not for personal gain, but for the betterment of others. Humble leaders know they have not arrived. The mission and vision of what they are trying to accomplish is too important to remain the same. Apex Leaders Continually Improve Are you willing to be rebuilt? Pride and arrogance are enemies of continual improvement.

Apex Leaders Form Strong Relationships One of the most impressive things about the leadership of Jesus was his continual focus on relationships.

Change is a Celebration!: Approaching Uncertainty with Confidence and a Positive Attitude

There is only one thing in your business which appreciates—your people. The most important relationship a leader needs to cultivate and protect is the relationship with their family. If you want to accomplish anything great as a leader, you must surround yourself with competent staff. Almost all important decisions made about you and your career take place when you are not in the room. So, always leave a trail of kindness and respect behind you.

Apex Leaders Make Others Better No matter how talented you are, you need someone who can make yourself better. No athlete ever demonstrated consistent excellence better than the legendary Hank Aaron. We over-celebrate big results and under-appreciate consistent excellence. Aaron reminds us greatness is not always achieved through short-term spectacular results but sometimes through long-term consistency.

Apex Leaders Lead by Example You cannot lead by example if you do not effectively lead yourself first. Leading by example means putting the mission of your organization above your personal aspirations. Leaders who lead by example fight for unity. Delivering results requires preparation, decisiveness, talent, limiting unnecessary mistakes, energy, continual improvement, confidence, good health, and passion.

The ability to deliver results determines if someone actually will follow them. By seeking out the experiences of others, we can grow faster with less drama. In The Book of Mistakes , Skip Prichard has created for us an absorbing fable of a young man and a young woman who are both part of a mysterious journey to learn the nine mistakes that tend to trip us up. While they make sense, they are not always intuitive. The truths presented here often stand between us and success. The main story follows David whose life of promise has become ordinary.

Through a life-altering event, he has a chance meeting with an Old Man who sets him on a journey that will take him to meet nine unique people who will share the nine mistakes and the impact these mistakes have had on their own lives. The nine mistakes are framed by three universal laws that are found in an ancient book of wisdom. The parallel story is about Aria and how she comes to be the keeper of the book of wisdom and how she learns of the three laws.

Printable Graphic The three universal laws enable the nine secrets to creating a successful future. To avoid the nine mistakes, you need to: Live your own dream. Recognize your inherent value. Surround yourself with the right people. Explore outside your comfort zone. More forward through challenges with determination and purpose. Act boldly with the knowledge that your potential success is unlimited. Pursue your goals with urgency. You think about people, about loving those around you. Your first is important because you also must have a longer view, or you will never accomplish the goals that are hard and take longer.

Their experiences help to identify and relate to the mistake and help us to take action to avoid the mistake in the future. Prichard brings a lot of wisdom to each of these common life issues. The story is engaging for young and old. Share this book widely because these are the kinds of mistakes that create regret down the road. At the end of your life these are the things that you look back on and wonder why no one ever told you about these pitfalls.

We are never too old to learn them and some are more difficult to deal with because of the baggage that often accompanies them.

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Now is the time to set your course. We work under the assumption that more is better. Morten Hansen thinks the way we work is broken. Not only that but how we manage and reward work, and how our culture recognizes hard work. What we call hard work may not be our best work. In Great at Work , Hansen reports on a five-year survey of 5, managers and employees, including sales reps, lawyers, actuaries, brokers, medical doctors, software programmers, engineers, store managers, plant foremen, nurses and even a Las Vegas casino dealer.

They discovered seven work smart practices. The first four involves mastering your own work, and the last three encompasses mastering working with others. Do Less, Then Obsess The common practice he found among the highest-ranked performers in the study was that they carefully selected which priorities, tasks, meetings, customers, ideas or steps to undertake and which to let go. They then applied intense, targeted effort on those few priorities in order to excel. He found that there were just a few key work practices related to this selectivity that accounted for two-thirds of the variation in performance among our subjects.

The typical inside-out view, by contrast, measures work according to whether we have completed our tasks and goals, regardless of whether they produce any benefits. Doing great work requires that you are getting feedback every day. In his study, 74 percent of the top performers reviewed their work in an effort to learn and improve. On 17 percent in the underperforming category did.

Aim for Passion and Purpose You can have one without the other, but we should aim for both. You may need to take a wider view of what ignites you. Expand your circle of passion by tapping into these dimensions. Getting other people on board takes more than just explaining the merits of your project. The best advocates in their study master two skills in this regard. Not just grit, but smart grit. Enlist others to help move your project forward. They become lone crusaders for their efforts—and they exhaust themselves in the process. As a matter of necessity, much of this work takes place in meetings.

The trick is to encourage constructive fights in meetings with cognitive diversity. Some people talk too little, and some people talk too much across teams and departments. He recommends disciplined collaboration. Fresh and compelling examples are used throughout to fully illustrate the seven smart work practices. In this moment we will take action that will affect our future or we will not. All we have is now. It is a flexible mindset so we can all learn to become a little more Nowist in our approach. One of the reasons that Nowists can see opportunities is that they are not stuck trying to protect their past; spending time and energy on something that no longer makes sense.

But they do possess a certain kind highly impulsive functional thinking. In a study performed at the University of Michigan on impulsivity, researchers found that there were two impulsive traits. And the kind that allows people to decide quickly with good results.

They are good at deciding quickly under pressure and are willing to choose an option even at the cost of making a mistake that they can and are willing to correct as they go forward. Procrastination Nowists take control of their time. They understand cause and effect. It is only in the Now that we can think, do, or change anything in the future. A Nowist is an active optimist. They believe they can make good things happen and take action to create a better future. Now is a good time to think about your Now. How will you use your NOW?

How does it feel to not be afraid? Steve Sims, the founder of Bluefish , has built a company that gets things done. Bluefish makes seemingly out-of-reach, change-your-life, experiences happen. He calls it bluefishing. Bluefishing is about changing your mindset. Bluefishers look for connections. What are people passionate about and how can I find a win-win for their passions? Passion is something you have to discover—your own and others too. Drill down for it.

Ask why at least three times. Try something and fail at it over and over until you find out how to do it properly—to see if it is worth pursuing—while everyone else is still trying to work out the demographics. They drowned from staying there. Discovery is just the beginning. You learned what to do on your next attempt. To build your brand, first, do a self-audit. What do you stand for? How do you want people to feel when they are around you? Discover your strengths and manage your weaknesses. Focus on your own weak links, the things that foul up your life or your work again and again and again.

Get others to talk about you—recommend you. Invest in your growth. Get better for your clients—your followers. And let them know. Topics discussed here include:. Change doesn't have to knock you off kilter. When the balance shiftsas it often doesthese tips will help you create as seamless a transition as possible. That way, you can hit the ground running and get back to chasing your goals and dreams right away. Stay ahead with the world's most comprehensive technology and business learning platform.

With Safari, you learn the way you learn best. Get unlimited access to videos, live online training, learning paths, books, tutorials, and more. You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy. Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. The following Bible passages provide the framework for my relationship with my neighborhood; Luke Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.

Instead I believe in helping out my neighbors by taking care of their walks, loaning out my possessions such as my fertilizer spreader, my snowblower, my lawnmower and other equipment. I let my actions demonstrate my faith and whenever possible tell of this faith to my neighbors. My church is an important part of my life, as I am a part of a church family. I also provide support for church by giving my time to teach Bible Class or to sing in the church choir and by giving my resources, such as my money and my possessions to the church.

In addition, I weekly attend church service to as Ephesians 5: Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. I believe God is asking me to share my riches with people in need, not only my riches but also my time. Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you.

We are living in times of stress. However, God is calling us to choose love instead of hate. I want to live at peace with all people and take every opportunity to pray for not only my friends and family but for the entire world. This is in keeping with Romans My wisdom comes from God as Proverbs 9: How vast is the sum of them! Wisdom comes from God and is mine for the asking as it is stated in James 1: Of course I will continue my learning through the completion of my Masters Program as well as by reading the paper, watching television news, the history channel and other educational shows.

My self-esteem comes because I know God loves me as Jeremiah My security is found in following God's direction as Psalm Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. I know this because it is confirmed in the words of one of my favorite Bible passages, Jeremiah My strength comes from my faith in God.

First I know he is always with me as 2 nd Thessalonians 2: Second, I know that it is not by my strength that my mission will be accomplished for Isaiah It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. Third, I believe that the saints who have gone before me are cheering me on as Hebrews Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Fourth, I know that nothing I do can separate me from God. He says in Romans 8: Lastly, I know that God is always with me as he said in Matthew I don't worry about my weaknesses because God turns them into strengths as 2 nd Corinthians That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. The Holy Spirit helps me as Romans 8: We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.

And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will. I believe my goal for my life is best expressed by a Cal Ripken Jr. Cal wanted to play the game of baseball in such a way that the game would be better because of him. It would be better because of the example he provided other ball players. It would be better because of how fans saw him. It would be better because of the other players he was able to mentor throughout his career. Along with this goal, Cal had another goal. He didn't want to do anything to jeopardize the game.

If he messed up, he wanted to contain his error so as few people as possible would be affected. This is the same way I want to live my life. I want the world to be a better place because of my actions, and because of the impact I have on other people. Also, on my bad days, where it seems I can't do anything right, I hope I don't mess things up too badly.

My Mission Statement

A simple illustration of this point is that I do not drive when I've been drinking. But, moving back to the larger meaning, I envision myself improving the world thru my relationship with my wife, with my daughters and with my family. I also want to lead by example. I feel a good attitude, whether it is at sports or in the office, is a valuable mentoring device. With that said, I will take the opportunity to act as an example and teach anyone I meet. I've taught youth league basketball.

I've volunteered on numerous organizations and committees. I try to foster good relationship with my friends. Overall, I try to lead a good life. I am a rule deontologist. I have a set of rules that I refer to for any decision I make. I find that regardless of how simple the decision, I refer to these rules. I've found this to be a subconscious act. I wasn't even aware I did this until I began analyzing myself as part of this course. I'm constantly review my decisions against my rule set.

This is my interpretation of Divine Command. To me, this doesn't mean follow the rules of the Church, or follow the Ten Commandments. It means that I should try to make decisions similar to those Jesus made. This is an impossible rule to consistently follow, but should be the basis for all my decisions. In other words, for me this rule by itself has consistency and feasibility issues.

The remaining rules are needed to fill the gap between this ideal behavior and what's actually realistic. If I can't accomplish rule number 1 and I do end up participate in unethical behavior, I hope that I don't commit any act so repulsive as to loose respect for myself. While this doesn't provide strict guidelines to follow, its generalizability makes it powerful.

I often refer to this rule as the litmus test or tie-breaker concerning difficult decisions. Those without sin can cast the first stone. Don't judge yet thee be judged thyself. Walk a mile in their shoes. All these sayings summarize my 3 rd rule. I try not to judge other peoples behavior and thoughts.

I feel that you can never truly know why someone acted as they did, and there is no way to know if you would act differently if you were in the same situation. As a result, don't judge others, because if you judge them you'll act differently and usually less favorably toward them. I feel the same way about life.

I want to act in a way that improves society, either by example or action, so the world is a better place after I leave. This is another broad rule that is directly related to rule 6, and supercedes rule 6. I feel there are certain demographics that should be protected and sheltered from the evils of society. I frequently equate this rule to children and the disabled. But I do expand this rule as the situation dictates. For example, if a decision is being made to fire an individual, and that person isn't involved in the discussion, I try to act in a way that provides respect and shelter for that individual.

I also apply this rule to justify minimum wage, workplace diversity, and other questionable societal issues. Freedom of choice is critical, even if that freedom could allow others to hurt you or your loved ones. I think freedom is imperative to society. We need to give people the freedom to act however they like. In some cases, we need to give people the freedom to make tough decisions, knowing that people could disobey these decisions and hurt themselves or society.

While this is a risk, taking away that freedom has a greater loss than living with the possibility of tragedy. I use this rule to justify the existence of companies, products and social causes that I do not agree with. I would rather these products exist than live in a repressive society. With that said, I think there are certain groups that need to be protected, so laws are required to protect those groups. Laws are required to limit freedom in certain cases.

I learned this in college, and it basically went against family values I was taught. I had the option of hiring a lawyer to help me reduce a sentence for a verdict I was guilty of committing. I couldn't see the reasoning behind this. Instead I investigated other avenues and found a rehabilitation program for first-time offenders. This was a culmination of many events that resulted in me adding this rule to the list.

I believe taking responsibility for your actions and failures is essential to development. Trying to get out of trouble usually results in getting into more trouble. It's best to stop the cycle, admit you are wrong and accept responsibility for whatever punishment will follow. This is another simple rule that I use frequently.

When truly used, it grows to encompass not only words, but behavior. In fact, it personally has iterated to have nearly the same meaning as treat others the way you'd like to be treated. But for me, the foundation is not to talk or act questionably bad behind someone's back. I find myself in many situations where I feel pressure or am inclined to break this rule. For this reason, this rule is in my top ten. I interpret this as the decision that seems the best on the surface is usually the best decision.

Digging into all possible circumstances and consequences is often wasted effort. I've found that if you make a decision based on good intentions see rule 10 for possible conflicts things will usually work out for the best. If, unfortunately, unimaginable consequences occur, be flexible to adjust your decision and rational to include this new information. In other words, learn from your mistakes. I find that I often trick myself into questionable behavior.

I often don't question the entire situation, because I'm happy being ignorant of all the implications. This rule could also be stated, it's easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission. Meaning, people are apt to forgive bad decisions if you claim you didn't know what you did was wrong. Regardless of whether you trick yourself or another person does, you should adjust your list of rules as needed. Add, modify, reorganize rules as needed to continue personal growth and help prevent unwanted behavior.

I adjust these rules often. I change their sequence.

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I add and remove rules. I believe I usually alter the rule set in an attempt to resolve consistency issues in my life. As I discussed in my position paper, I was raised in a family that preached similar rules to what I have listed, but practiced deception and exploitation. At times, when I don't reference my rule set, I fall back into exploitation. At work, I could easily convince myself to go home with office supplies or to lie on an expense report. It's only when I consult my rule set that I realize the inconsistency and stop the behavior.

I have to admit, it only takes me a split second to review a decision against my rule set, but I do perform this review. Again, I didn't even know I was doing it before this class started. It had always occurred subconsciously. At times when I fall back into exploitation, I may find that I add a rule to my top 10 that allows me to perform unethical actions. For example, if I wanted to inflate an expense report, I could alter my rule set to rationalize this behavior. This change would make my action rational, but would create a consistency conflict that would begin to bother me.

I would refer to this conflict as guilt. To remove the guilt, I would end up changing my decision and readjusting my rule set back to one that is both rational and consistent. Given this background, I have to say I struggle with what controls me. The greater good usually prevails, but I am human and I do make poor decisions. In these cases, I would say that power, or egoism, control me. I find this painful to admit, but at these points of weakness they do control me.

I usually win, that is why I don't consider myself an egoist. I also know my initial tendency is to exploit. This also adds to my struggle. I feel I have to change my default decision because my initial thoughts are unethical and exploitive. I find that if I don't refer to my rule set, I can easily make unethical decisions that completely go against the goals I've set for myself.

This is the battle I fight. Ideally I want to be the doting husband. I want to provide the ultimate life for my wife. I want to remove all worries from her life. I want to provide whatever she may desire. In my ideal relationship, my wife and I would take time to discuss the deep philosophical issues we witness in our life daily. I'd want us to hardly disagree on the trivial activities of life. I'd want to live our lives in a way that our children can tell just by looking at us that we are in love with each other.

My actual relationship with my wife is drastically different. We debate the complex issues of life as well as the trivial. At times, we have these debates, or fights, in front of the children. I rarely spend time with my wife. Time I spend with my wife is not spent doting, or nurturing, or loving. Time spent with my wife is usually spent comparing scorecards we keep on our activities.

We compare these scorecards when we argue, because we desperately want to convince our partner to take on more responsibilities. My wife and I are in marriage counseling to help with this. I imagine if things continued down this path, our children would say we love each other but are too caught up in daily life to show each other that love.

My father was a consultant and traveled frequently. He was basically away during the week and busy with chores during the weekend. I knew my father loved me, and knew he showed his love by working so hard; however, I wanted my father to be more involved in my life. That is the role I want to pay in my daughters' lives. I want to be involved. I want to play with them. I want to help them learn. I want to teach them of the mysteries of life.

Since I was a child, I've had a vision of my daughter pointing to a star in the sky and asking me about it. In this vision, I tell her that the star is actually a planet. I go on to tell her specifics about the planet. She's amazed by how much I know. To her, Dad is a superhero. I do take time to be part of my daughter's lives. I do make time to play with them, and teach them. I consider myself fun. I consider myself a good father. Right now my daughters are too young to point to a star and ask questions. If they did I wouldn't be able to tell them anything about them. I couldn't point out a planet, from a star, from a plane, from a satellite.

My wife and I moved to Oregon, after we got married. We stayed there on assignment for one year. This helped us realize how important family was for us, because neither of us had family on the West coast. We moved back to the Mid West, where our family is located, with the belief we'd take advantage of living so close to family. We said we'd no longer miss the small events of life. We'd make time to be there for all important moments.

We'd be the family members who traveled for Baptisms, weddings, birthdays, etc. In actuality, since we've moved back from Oregon, we routinely decide not to travel due to these obligations. We've missed two Baptisms since we've moved back. We find it extremely easy not to attend less formal family events. However, once we realize we're ignoring family, we do make the effort to join in. I think part of our missing events is due to our family's current stage. We have a two-year-old and a six-month-old.

Given this, I think our lower level of family involvement is somewhat justified. As the children get older, I foresee us traveling to more events. I have a small amount of core friends that I keep throughout life. To me, these friends are family. I want to be there as a family member would be to my friends.

For example, I want to be the friend who helps my friends move, paint, or work on a similar project. I have helped friends move and paint. I believe I am a good friend; however, due to my current family complexity I haven't had as much time for extended family or good friends.

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I need to spend more time maintaining these relationships as the girls grow up and I gain more free time. I consider myself a loyal employee. Also, I want to act with integrity, even if it may hurt my own career. With this said, I know my family is more important than work.

I do not want to make the same mistakes I feel my father made. I want to have a good work-life balance. I want to be able to leave work for a family emergency. I'd like to be able to take a vacation without calling into a meeting or carrying around a laptop. I think I am a loyal employee. I think I do act with integrity at the office. I have acted in ways that improve the company but hurt my career. Also, I do balance work and life effectively. I do have moments where I have to call into meetings when I'm on vacation; however, I try to limit this and I do enjoy vacation time.

I have to admit that there are times when I let work take control of me. I do find myself working at 1am in the morning. However, I think I quickly recognize when this occurs and I take actions to resolve this conflict. A few rules summarize my learning style. First, I want to try everything once. Second, I don't judge, unless I want to be judged by others. To me, these rules merge into the perfect learning spirit. To summarize, I think you learn best by experiences. You should try anything once. Also, you shouldn't be arrogant and think anything is above you. There isn't anything you shouldn't do.

For example, an overly masculine individual should try to paint, write, dance, etc. Similarly, a feminine personality should spend a day on the farm, should go fishing, should try to fix a tractor, etc. This is my method for learning. I want to keep trying things. I want to keep learning. Through introspection and thru counseling, I've found that I depend on my core group of family and friends for my security. I get this security thru confidence. I get this confidence by succeeding at new situations I place myself into. This is directly related to my comments about learning.

I am a pleaser. I need to succeed at events. I also need to witness my success through someone else. I depend on others to rate my performance. I find it is like a mirror. In reality, this means I lack self-confidence. I need someone present to validate my confidence. As a result of this, maintaining my self-confidence, maintaining my security has been and will continue to be one of the key struggles of my life. This is also related to my learning style of trying things.

I gain strength and confidence from having accomplished new activities. I draw upon these successes when I have new challenges or new situations I'm presented with. As a result, I feel that I turn challenges into strengths. Digging deeper into this point, I find that I concentrate on a shortcoming or a weakness I have. I eventually attack that weakness head-on, trying new things and putting myself in situations where the weakness is exposed.

My goal in doing this is to eliminate the weakness. I've tried to address a number of weaknesses in my life, from my lack of self-confidence, to talking in public, to questioning power figures, to admitting when I need help. All these are issues I struggled with over my life. I haven't completely addressed each of these issues, but at least I've started attacking them. My mission in life is basically to be a good and honest person. I want to be a good wife, daughter, sister, mother and friend. In addition, I want to be a good employee and have a successful career without ever having to compromise the principles that guide my life.

If I can accomplish my mission, the results may not be tangible, but they will bring me personal satisfaction. The moral values taught to me by my parents and my religion is what guides every aspect of my life. I will never allow ambition for power or money to influence my mission or my daily life if it means that I have to compromise my principles. My relationship with my husband is that of a friend. I would like to continue to nurture this relationship with mutual respect and trust, and be supportive of him.

I am expecting our first child in November. I would like to have a relationship with my child like the one I have with my own parents. I want my child to be able to openly discuss any aspect of his life with me. I want my child to respect me not out of awe or fear but out of love. In turn, I would like to give my child the respect, trust and friendship that come with unconditional love.

My relationship with my parents has always been one of admiration and respect. I've always tried to emulate their lives and tried to live by their guidelines. I am not always able to spend as much time with them as I would ideally like due to the geographical distance separating us, but whatever time we get together, I would like to show them how much I love them. My relationship with my siblings has been one of love and support for each other. I would like to continue to be supportive and let them know that I am always there for them.

For me, family is the most important thing in the world. My husband's family is also an important part of my life for the past five years since we've been married. Their outlook to life is a little different from that of me and my family probably due to cultural differences, as my husband and I are from different countries, but I respect their opinions and they have accepted me as I am.

When they are here, I do a lot of things out of respect for them that I normally would not do. I try to make their visits to my home comfortable and enjoyable. I don't make friends easily. I am a friendly person and have many acquaintances, but only a select few are true friends that I would trust with my life. Once I consider someone a friend, I will go all out for that person. If they ever need me, I will never think twice about helping a friend. This is however, a fine line, because if a friend asks me to do something illegal or immoral or unethical, then I would have to refuse even if it costs me the friendship.

However, I also know that the true friends that I have will never put me in a situation where I would have to choose between them and my principles and that is the reason they are my friends. I've always been a loyal and conscientious worker. I've been known to go above and beyond the call of duty.

I'd like to continue to work with that ideology, without thinking of what benefits I may get. To me the biggest benefit of being a good worker is my reputation and my credibility. We have great confidence in her judgment. I have refused to recommend friends and family members at times when I felt that they were not a good fit for the job, and have had to face their resentment and displeasure. But I was not willing to compromise my integrity for the sake of friendship. I believe that life itself is a learning experience.

In addition, to my formal education, which includes pursuing an MBA degree, I am also an avid reader of novels from all over the world. This exposes me to different cultures and lifestyles. I also like to watch movies from other countries. I occasionally read religious books. I have read the Quran and the Bible as my father is Muslim and my mother used to be a Catholic.

Also, having grown up in India , I was also exposed to Hinduism, Sikhism, Buddhism and some other sects. Exposure to different religions and cultures has made me more open minded and tolerant to diversity. Self Esteem and Security: I derive my self esteem from my family. They have always been incredibly supportive and have always believed in me. They always encouraged me and told me that I could do anything I set my mind to.

I derive my security in the knowledge that my family is always there for me, no matter what. Although I am not a deeply religious person, I have a strong faith in God and believe that whatever happens to us happens for a reason. In the Holy Quran, it states that God gives each person only as much as that person can bear. It is this belief that gives me strength in the most adverse of situations. My life's mission is to provide a stable, positive environment that enables my family to grow and prosper. I want to create a legacy for my children to add to and pass along to their children.

As humans, we don't live forever. And, for most of us, we won't end up in the history books. However, this doesn't resolve us to be forgotten when the final bell rings. I truly feel that we can live forever in the sense that the generations that come after us will use the lessons and values that we taught them. I feel particularly strong about this belief as a parent.

In order to do this, there are many smaller objectives that I must meet. First, I feel that I need to help them develop their own moral framework from which they will make all decisions, both in business and in life. Second, I feel that I have a responsibility to help them establish a sense of work ethic. Third, I need to give them a sense of self-worth and self-esteem through positive learning. Fourth, I must set a good example when it comes to a stable family environment. Fifth, I need to help them to see the virtue in the never-ending process of learning.

Finally, I feel that I need to instill a sense of discipline that keeps them moving along this path. This list is not all-inclusive; rather, it is the list I am currently working with. If history is a good predictor of the future, I will certainly learn more, and hopefully improve and expand my list of objectives to better accomplish my life's mission.

I feel that I am very fortunate to have a guide to accomplish my life's mission. My guide is not one person or one thing; it is the experiences that I have had, the people that have taught me along the way, and my interpretation of it all that illuminates the path to my future.