The Best Ways to Discipline Your Child – What Works For Real Moms - Borrow Time Book Series
Glad you liked it Vibha! Worked beautifully until one fine day my daughter asked me if the fairy was real or I had something to do with it. Her fairy left her one last gift and a note some time after that saying she had to go out of town and would try to come back soon. Thanks for sharing this valuable article. As a dad who struggles with not only self-discpline but also disciplining is that a word? My wife is a elementary educator and uses these awesome techniques regularly.
Of course, she almost always wins the race. Chris, we do that too! We set up our daughter to either race against us or the clock, and most of the time it works. I personally like to offer choices as often as possible. What we do now, not only impacts the rest of our kids lives, but also how they parent some day and so the impact they have on their kids and so on!
It really is a choice with a little bit of work upfront, but a very long lasting impact! As always, great article. Ignoring bad behavior is not positive parenting.
To me, this is just avoiding to address it. One behavior we wanted to address was the kids constantly put their clothes all over the floor in their rooms. We tried several things, but what eventually worked for us was the following: They are safe, they are just kids so we expect them to make a mess. Twice a week, they are required to clean up their rooms and this includes picking up clothes on the floor.
This has worked great for us. The nagging from us and the complaints from the kids has almost stopped. About 4, I think you and Kaila might be saying similar things but from different perspectives? For instance, Kaila says when her kids play with her magazines, she ignores the behavior at the moment , but moves the object out of reach later. By the way, I love your idea of a to-do list white board. I can see how that can help reduce a lot of the nagging and bickering… Thanks for sharing! But if I give that child the benefit of the doubt my insanity is simply a by-product, not the goal, of their behavior , I can look at the situation through their eyes.
They are simply trying, no matter how poorly, to separate from us so they can be strong enough to leave. They have to convince themselves they WANT to leave the nest so warm, so safe for all the uncertainties and demands of higher education, a tiny dorm room and life with a stranger. They have to take some pretty big steps toward really growing up in a compressed time period. With that perspective, I can be gentler in my disciplining, ignore some of the crap and be more lavish with my unconditional love during a very stressful time for THEM. During a particularly high experimentation period last year, my daughter broke her jaw and her arm in 2 separate incidents in a 2 week period.
The wailing miraculously stopped after a very short time. She pulled herself together, got up, and got on with going to bed. So, thanks for giving us more tools! I was thinking about this quite a bit after responding the Alvin the other day. In our case too, when my daughter starts getting too agitated, I just step away and let her calm down a bit and generally when she does I try to give her a hug and listen.
Love the analogy of power tools — so appropriate. I always explain that in time the idea of providing choices will become second nature because it becomes more natural the more you do it. The other day I laughed as I was in Pet Smart with my two kids and they asked for a reptile.
In unison both of the kids looked at me and said can you provide us two choices. I smiled and said, well we are not getting another pet. So we have two choices 1 we can stay here and look at the pets some more or 2 we can go to a park!!! Just a cute reminder of how used to the positive parenting practices my kiddos are.
Great articles and comments everyone. I have a 3 yr old boy who is quite aggressive, loud and gets very angry. We have moved back to Australia from the US where he was born and was all he knew, now he is home with me and since going to day care is hitting spitting and screaming a lot when asked to do something. I am currently teaching my little son everything about emotions. He is starting to distinct each emotion which means that he is one step closer to taming them. Thank you for your precious insights! Thanx for post this helpful article. If you are searching best preschool for your child then you should visit Cambridge Montessori preschool.
Cambridge Montessori Preschool is the best preschool in delhi. I love this little mini course …. I think I might be a little late in the game though as my child is almost 7 …. I have a sticky situation with my son as I adopted him and some behaviors are hard to break. My niece has three children with one set of twins. He wanted all the attention to himself. I immediately tried to explained to him that his brother only wanted to join in with the fun we were having together. That what we were doing was fun and others might want to join in and have some fun too!
8 Positive Discipline Techniques Every Parent Should Know - A Fine Parent
This worked to no avail. It was only when I pulled him close to me and gave him a gentle loving hug, kissed him on the cheek, and whispered in his ear how much I loved him and kindly asked him to please be nice to his brother did he finally stop the behavior.
He needed reassurance that he was loved. Your email address will not be published. Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed. We've done the work for you! Use our well-curated gift guides to save time on gift shopping and spend that time with your family instead! Receive others just like it once per week directly in your mailbox.
Comments This is a great article! I loved Ignore bad behaviour and using puppets!
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So yes, these techniques work and I will try to remember a few as my family grows together. Enjoyed reading and forwarded on to my darling wife. Thanks so much for sharing Vibha Chris Melanie. Thanks for the kind words about the article, Alvin.
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8 Positive Discipline Techniques Every Parent Should Know
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Taming tantrums without trauma for parent or kid?