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From One Addict to Another: One Mans Journey from the Depths of Sexual Addiction to Freedom

It elevates the experience. Spirit is happy that we love each other. It has many sides, including sexiness. How different our attitudes would be! Just as baby chicks imprint on their mothers, we imprint on our parents. You were fortunate if your parents modeled a healthy sexuality and taught you to be proud of your body. Regrettably, for the rest of us, such self-esteem about our bodies is hard-earned. However, using the following strategies, you can let go of negative programming. Seeing yourself as an erotic being and embracing your own allure are the rewards of awakening sexual energy.


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Sometimes, though, we resist our own sexiness or having sex at all because it mirrors our insecurities. Is my partner judging me? Am I a good lover? Will I disappoint my partner? Will I be rejected?

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There are practical steps you can take to overcome resistance. You have to want to be sexy and keep passion alive in a relationship. Denial and apathy are the enemies of passion. So stay alert to the following deterrents to a good sexual energy exchange. Then you can correct the situation. Sexual responsiveness is a sensitive barometer. Intimacy requires self-awareness and a willingness to remove obstacles. Taking action can help you achieve a loving, erotic relationship.

On a daily basis, train yourself to be more mindful about getting rest and pacing yourself. Though family, work, and other demands can intrude on making time for sexual energy, being dedicated to self-care can help you prioritize it in your relationship. To cure self-doubts, you need to be solution-oriented. For more complex issues such as fear of intimacy, reach out to a therapist or a friend for insight.

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While exploring your fears, be kind to yourself. Such sweetness allows you to mend wounds and reclaim your sexual power. Orgasm is the crown jewel of surrender. You tap into the primordial flow of life as well as release tension. The more surrendered you are, the more ecstatic the orgasm. Sex and orgasms are an intrinsic part of being human. For me, these are the great rewards of having a body! The World Health Organization estimates that at least a hundred million acts of intercourse take place each day worldwide.

Imagine if even half of these were motivated by love—what ecstasy would surround the planet! On average, American couples have sex two times per week. The average male orgasm lasts ten seconds and a female orgasm is twenty seconds or longer. I could hardly believe the national polls revealing that nearly 50 percent of women report having orgasms infrequently or not at all during intercourse. These statistics highlight a glaring reluctance many of us have to be honest with our partners about our sexual energy exchanges. What is an orgasm?

How could this miracle ever be just one thing?

It involves physical, emotional, spiritual, and energetic surrenders. In men, orgasm typically occurs from stimulating the penis; in women, from stimulating the clitoris or the sacred G-spot in the vagina. These parts of our body are marvelously sensitive due to a high density of nerve fibers. Caressing them activates pleasure centers in the brain. Your body shifts gears. Your heart rate increases. Blood rushes to your genitals, making them swell. At climax men, and some women, ejaculate. You experience waves of pleasure, stress evaporates, and a warm glow permeates your body.

Your biology wants you to relax into a blissful surrender through the sexual energy between two people. Emotions play a different role in orgasm for men and women. I am reluctant to stereotype genders, but for women emotional intimacy and trust are often more necessary in order to feel safe enough to let go—though of course physical attraction is essential too. Orgasms are easier when we feel treasured.

If we feel criticized, unappreciated, or rushed it can be difficult, if not impossible, to surrender during sex. In contrast, men are more biologically wired to prioritize orgasm over an emotional connection or even trust. Physical attraction may be all that it takes to climax. Nevertheless, there are also many loving, sexy men who are emotionally sensitive, responsive, and in no hurry at all.

Foreplay is an opportunity for couples to arouse and nurture each other though women seem to crave it more. The average man can have an orgasm within a few minutes or less. Women may need up to twenty minutes of foreplay. Ideally, of course, neither partner hears a clock ticking. Many couples I treat are in paradise letting sexual energy tension mount before intercourse without any sense of time. Foreplay lets them feel close, explore, play, prolong the ecstatic pangs of arousal. I liken foreplay to tuning a musical instrument. Then foreplay never just feels like work.

During foreplay it needs to be manually or orally stimulated unless the angle of your bodies happens to be just right, which is less likely. Couples must know this so they can mutually pleasure each other. Then they can plan erotic interludes to leisurely enjoy each other during a sexual energy exchange and the pleasures their bodies have to offer. Set aside uninterrupted time to playfully experiment. Begin to relax by breathing deep and slow. We habitually breathe shallowly to temper sexual and other feelings.

I want you to sense, not think, to be fully in your body. Exploring each other is never just a one-time event. Experiment with what gives you both goose bumps, tingles, or surges of warmth. Notice how your body feels, all of it. This lets you experience more pleasure and intimacy.

From an intuitive perspective , your orgasm is never just your own during lovemaking. Sexual energy gets transmitted to your partner, affecting his or her well-being. Your energy fields overlap, conveying both joy and despair even during brief hookups. From that perspective, there is no such thing as casual sex. I want you to be. During orgasm ordinary boundaries blur. In the best of situations, orgasm is an exchange of energy that blesses both partners.

Tantra is a potent Hindu system that teaches the art of erotic love by combining sex and spirit. Westerners often see sex as linear, the goal being orgasm, but tantra views sexual love as a sacrament and an energy exchange between two people. Using specific positions, you move erotic energy upward from the genitals to nourish and purify your whole being. Energy is emitted through the eyes: Eye contact is a way to stay connected to your partner. Also during orgasm, when energy rises, you may liberate uncomfortable emotions. Have I done something wrong? To experience how knowing about sexual energy can improve your sex life, try the following exercise alone or with a partner.

See if the following fears are stopping you. To surrender these fears, envision a new paradigm of sexual energy success. Dispense with old ideas and embrace truer ones. The first switch is to permanently retire the notion that good sex is equated only with performance. This leads to performance anxiety, which only prevents good sex and orgasms.

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Would my wife walk out? How would my counselor recommend we move forward? Join me as I enter this session and co. Nick Fouts is the co-founder of Cedar Rock Ministries that strives to teach people about how to incorporate rest into their lives. He has experience as a presenter, counselor, and he has served on the mission field in Africa. Nick and Doug discuss the. Working Step 4 — Fears. Isolating for me is easy. Changing that behavior is hard. Walk with me as I respond to challenges from my counselor to reach out to other men.

I am trying to break out of isolation and move into building intimacy with other men and modeling that for a. Working Step 4 — Resentments.

Part B — Jorge and Doug discuss the next aspect of working Step 4 in sex addiction recovery. Part A — Jorge and Doug discuss the overview of working Step 4 in sex addiction recovery. Mark Laaser of Faithful and True Ministries shares his story as the first podcast of He also shares practical advice from his practice about recovery practices. He emphasizes that men recover best in community and dealing appropriately with. Doug discusses some topics for focusing on the new year. We pray for blessing upon you and your family in , and we look forward to an exciting year of guests, topics, and testimo.

Jorge and Doug talk about the upcoming holidays as well as two tools that are helpful in recovery. They discuss the importance of the season as well as difficulties for addicts during the holidays. Meetings are an important part of entering into recovery. Beginning to integrate into a 12 step program is daunting. My experience was intimidating but rewarding. Hopefully I can give you an overview of how it works and. God Can Get Your Attention.

Doug gives an example of a story he heard during his recovery that helped him realize that God is willing to go to any length to get our attention and purify us. Those methods might seem harsh at the on set, but they are ultimately an act of love. We made a decision to turn our lives and our wills over to the care of God, as we understood God. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. Of all the content we have posted on Castimonia. Please take a few minutes to listen to these. I am a Christian and a sex addict. This is my Journal through Recovery as it happens.

Many are deep nuggets of wisdom buried inside an easy to remember saying. While some may seem trivial, they often have a deep truth to be explored.

I am a sex addict and my wife (or husband) knows

Jorge and Doug discuss man. Giving Thanks for Addiction??? Jorge and Doug discuss the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday in terms of recovery. Family and friends are not always easy to be around, but especially when dealing with recovery issues. They discuss travel plans as well as ways to handle in-laws. Clean Castimonia Purity Podcast Episode 28b: God walked with him and carried him through the pain to reach better days on the other side. Listen as Mike discusses the practical and. Clean Castimonia Purity Podcast Episode 28a: His honest approach to the dark days in his past show the power that Satan can have over us.

He talks about his youth as well as the slippery slope of his addiction.

How to Harness Sexual Energy For Spiritual Growth & Healing

He has a story that powerfully displays the way that sexual impurity can affect those around us. He speaks about the pr. Clean Castimonia Purity Podcast Episode 26b: Jorge takes us through the second part of his story. He guides us through the steps he needed to find healing as well as long-lasting sobriety.

It is possible to find healing from any addiction, and Jorge discusses some of the key elements that he ne. Clean Castimonia Purity Podcast Episode 26a: John takes us through the hope portion of his recovery…how did his recovery start and what resources worked for him to find healing. Our new format will be set up to make all testimonies a 2-part series from now on to allow for us to hear and conne.

Sex Addiction can be a dark place. Pornography and lust can trap us in a dark pit. Hearing God or our Hgher Power can be difficult, but there are still ways. Andy and Doug discuss ways that God speaks to us today as well as practices to hear His voic. She was trained directly by Carnes, and she has a host of resources on her websites.

Sex Addiction recovery relies on several tools that addicts can learn from. One of those is the intentional decision to look at all behaviors and categorize them. Certain behaviors are healthy, others are obviously sinful or dangerous, and other beha. Jorge walks through his story of early exposure to pornography and sexual abuse. He talks about the tie-ins to his addiction in adulthood, and his out of control lifestyle. He discusses his journey through a world of sex, power, and ego. Doug utilizes his Celebrate Recovery testimony to share his struggle with pornography, lust, and sex addiction.

He shares the history and foundation of his life that built pathways that developed into addiction. He highlights the negative choices that. We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. That is a powerful step in recovery after realizing how broken, powerless, and insane our behaviors were previously. Nate Larkin, Founder of Samson Society. Grace for the Addict. He talks specifically of addiction and how grace is our undeserved gift from God, and how i. Andy discusses the power of God in his life in finding healing from addiction to pornography.

He discusses his childhood and life-long struggle with pornography and lust. He highlights the dangers that pornography brought to his life as well as the eff. Milton Magness — Stop Sex Addiction. Milton Magness is a leader in the fight against sex addiction, and he has developed a proven system for couples to find healing. He highlights the power of addiction within the chemicals of the brain based upon years of conditioning.


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Sex Addiction and Polygraphs…an interview with Stephen Cabler. Stephen Cabler is a nationally recognized polygrapher and a leader in the use of polygraphs with sex addicts. He is now protecting his relationship with the addiction because he has swallowed the lie that it is not hurting anyone.

The addiction now has its hook set in the individual and will lead his mind and body to places he never intended to go. The hopelessness and despair of what has been can lead to suicide. In this brief discussion I have tried to give a simple answer to a very complicated addiction. On the contrary, such men need accountability, honesty, and support. As the body of Christ, we need to open our eyes and hearts to the fact that we may be sitting on the same pew beside a wounded brother every Sunday. A Christian Sex Addict?

The Need For Compassion And Understanding In this brief discussion I have tried to give a simple answer to a very complicated addiction. Latest Popular Comments Tags. Ministry Announcement November 21, Sign up for our Email Newsletter.