Bananas Luck (Stories to put your children to sleep)
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Probably you will feel upset, but you must approach the issue in a neutral way. Don't lose your rag.
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The meal table should never be a site of conflict. You shouldn't make any threats around food. But then that wouldn't happen in my household. I wouldn't make pudding a treat. I would offer the pudding during supper. I would let the child eat the pudding first if she wanted to. I wouldn't let them go to bed hungry.
So many children won't eat at certain stages in their development, but then they change. I would give them pasta seven nights a week if necessary. Both Orbach and Stirling-Reed point to the cultural factors over our difficulties and anxieties with food. In the part of Brittany where she moved to live with her family Le Billon is Canadian, her husband is French , the French food culture was incredibly strict.
No snacking was tolerated. Proper table manners were insisted upon. If children wouldn't eat, they were left to go hungry. You ate together — either at school or with the family — at regular times, and you ate slowly. Food is not seen as a pacifier, or an emotional distraction or a reward or a punishment. The subject of whether food is "healthy" or not barely arises.
They don't, as Anglo-American cultures tend to, think of food to be parcelled out in indices of food groups, calories and nutrients. It is about enjoyment and variety. As a result, there were almost no fussy eaters in these traditional French communities. Kids ate pretty much everything the adults ate, and with relish. Which is all very well when you live somewhere where everyone, rich and poor, behaves the same, and the school canteen has the standards of a decent restaurant. The French solution is unlikely to work in cultures such as the UK that are more predicated on individual choice.
Billon's successful struggle to get her children to eat better — even in the supportive Breton environment — stretched over a difficult year.
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So what is the solution? There are plenty of books on how to get your children to eat well — a good example is Getting the Little Blighters to Eat by Claire Potter , which contains an excellent practical guide to getting children to eat a good diet. It offers the following very sensible advice. Completely let go of the parent-to-child authority that you use in other areas of life. Simply give your child their food and act as if you don't mind whether they eat it or not. No commands, no orders, no tellings-off, no threats, no punishments, no bribes. This is because children want attention, even bad attention, and food is a perfect place for getting it.
So as soon as you let go of the power struggle, they are liable to be more willing to eat a more varied diet — because they have nothing to gain by refusing it.
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This all sounds like very good sense. I am not a nutritionist or a dietician or a psychologist. But as someone with four daughters, I have a very non-scientific, muddle-through policy and it seems to be going OK though in the case of my youngest two daughters, my wife, Rachael, does much more of the feeding than me. She is also tougher than me about food, possibly because she works so much harder to put good food on the table — she spends many hours preparing and cooking good fresh food, which she often has a battle to get the children to eat, particularly the seven-year-old, Esme, who for stubborn eating patterns matches Ruby.
Both Lydia, my year-old, and Cissy, 18, are much more tractable about food for no obvious identifiable reason — they received more or less exactly the same treatment as their sisters. Rachael sometimes thinks I am unsupportive because I will simply not get into battles over it. I can see her point — I can even feel her point emotionally — but I long ago decided that it just isn't worth it, because it doesn't produce results. But I identify with her feelings very strongly, because I have been through all those feelings of anger and disappointment and rejection.
Mothers cure to toddlers insomniahalf a banana before bed
In fact I still feel those things sometimes — I just try not to let them determine my behaviour. My improvised and cobbled-together policy can be summed up thus: Eat together whenever possible but don't make an issue about it. As little snacking as possible — but you don't have to have an iron "no snacking" rule. Let them eat junk food, but not often.
Let them eat food in front of the TV, but not often. And give them vitamin pills if they're eating poorly — why the hell not? Make sure the food you give them tastes good. By the age of one, Aaron was only sleeping for 4 hours during the night and cat napping during the day.
His mother says every three weeks or so he would be so overly exhausted that he would sleep through one night. As the sleepless nights continued he began to show signs of sleep deprivation; such as hitting his head, grinding his teeth and screaming.
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At the end of her tether with this routine, his mother spoke to a sleep specialist at her sons nursery. She had also had problems with her child sleeping when he was young and had resolved the problem by giving him half a banana before bed. Willing to try anything the mother gave Aaron half a banana before bed and he slept the whole night. It is not known why the banana has had this effect, but bananas are a great source of potassium and magnesium which both help to relax overstressed muscles.
They also contain something called tryptophan, which convert to serotonin and melatonin, which calm hormones. Doctors state that other slow release foods such as peanut butter and wholemeal bread can also help with restless nights. Has your child gone through phases of bad sleepless nights?