Facing PTSD: A Combat Veteran Learns to Live with the Disorder

There was so much damage done I now am alone and not one person is here to help. They all say time to help myself. Now that I really need physical help. All the trauma has almost killed me literally. I will pray for you. Sign up for housing now the waiting lists are horrific. Very strange to me to write this. I am Veteran, never took life. Those of you who have or did God bless your spirit. But I saw plenty of it. I saw the horror of war and the aftermath. When I was back on base I took up my normal duties of a military police officer.

Like clock work I saw the war continued in returning soldiers from deployment. Anger, violence, domestic abuse, and even homicide and or suicides. I buried it all. Never let it get to me. Now, almost 5 years out of the service I cannot stop seeing it, hearing it, smelling it.

My anxiety is through the roof and I seem to not fit in to society anymore. I am tired of feeling afraid, of hating people, and of this isolation inside my own head. I guess I need to seek some people who can relate. I love overseas and have no VA near me, no Americans for that matter hardly, and I just feel lost. Am I crazy to feel this after being out so long now? Am I broken for life? Any words of advice welcome. Its normal and common for people to feel as you do sometimes it can come about later on fotr no reason or a trigger like a failed or stressful relationship.

Principally not having a group or prople who have similar backgrounds as you as support can leave one isolated and paranoid, more so if you have anxiety problems. Try to skype or do whatever you can to establish a reconnect to people from your past or youth from where your from.

Im sure many of them would be really interested in your experiences and by talking about things it will release some ptsd or anxieties and give you a base of support from familiar grounds. Dont give up and look for outlets you havnt explored. Hell, tumbling in a Rodeo down an embankment and waking up hours later to a broken leg and stuck in the truck is serious traumatic stress. We go into the "Fight or Flight" stage of reaction to any traumatic event. So, all of these events hit you with traumatic stress, but you effectively navigated your way out at that moment.

What happens next is thinking about what just happened. Often, we find ways to stop thinking about that moment by distraction or internalizing the feelings. Good God, getting back into a vehicle after my tumble was horrific, but I had no other option. That event happened 18 years ago and I'm still hypervigilant when driving. I trained myself to handle the situation and I am so the best driver ever now: The more death I saw, the more training I conducted in my head.

I had to change my thinking, deliberately. The same thing you did for so many years until it caught up with you. I am diagnosed with PTSD and all that comes with it. Been through so many different programs, different therapies, and different conversations to help pull me out this hole. All those emotions you describe are symptoms I went through. For me, they all popped out at the same time and freaked me out. Alcohol was my doctor for 11 solid years. Unfortunately, I still allowed my thinking to keep me distant from everyone and anything reminding me of those stressful traumatic events.

If you're crazy, over 20 million others stand with you. Change your thinking, change your life. You have to get back to that point where you had a proper perspective of events and functioned without the thought you have now. The first thing the Shrink does is put you on Wellbutrin to shift your mood. Bwahaha - Most Vets agree this drug is crap. Then they try to help with anxiety you know, that piece of you that can't stop thinking or moving?

Oh, these drugs will help take that edge off, but recent studies prove they only hurt more than help those of us suffering from PTSD. They'll have you on8 different meds with each having side-effects with the other. Brother, if you desire to stay broken for life, maintain your current thought process. You will choose your path by choosing how to think about the past, present, and future.

The only thing MAN controls is his thinking. Distract your mind so you reflect less on all those traumatic events. I found working my distraction. Exercise to induce the endorphins you need for your mood swings back to "happy. Humans are designed to interface with other humans. Without that interaction, you stay isolated and retain the cycle you are in now. God Bless you, Brother! You are at war but within yourself. You need a "Strategy" for winning this war.

Once you own your strategy, you'll develop tactics, techniques and procedures to win each of the daily battles you face. These events visiting you are quite horrendous There are many out there like you.

You are not alone. I used long walks along the beach I hid it all this time but now it's too heavy to carry anymore. What I went through is nothing compared to you guys today, but each night for this time if I sleep I get blown up, I normally go days awake NOS and coffee but I'm tired of it all. Really thinking of leaving society all together live on my farm no power no outside contact.

I'm tired not weak just fucking done. I was in the Frankfurt PX parking lot when the car bomb detonated. I had been in the Army for 6 months, then. I know how you feel. I have sleep issues nightmares and multiple other issues, too. I live on my very remote farm and keep to myself, mostly. The VA is little help. Just want to put you on a bunch of drugs. I have no use for that. The VA is a corrupt and lawless entity and a lawyer can roll their goat smelling asses up, most rickety tick.

My symptoms got gradually worse as I got older. We do better when we are younger. I started getting fired from jobs in my mid's. I don't play well with pencil necks and others who practice stupidity. I drank heavily from until last year. Drunk was the only time that I could laugh. I got lucky in My uncle retired from the VA after 30 years and got me started in the right direction. The big city VA hospitals are veteran meat grinders, where I am from. If you don't have VA access, file a disability claim for tinnitus ringing in the ears.

They will approve that without issue. My uncle put me onto that. Once rated, you are in the system. You can use veteran service organizations like the American Legion, VFW or a county Veteran rep to file simple claims, like for hearing. Do not waste your time using them for anything other than very simple claims.

The VA practices chaos and insanity, by the minute, and their rules and regulations defy logic. They will roll up and blow away a veteran service rep and don't give a tinker's damn if he likes it or not. They will give up and go away whereas a lawyer will dig in, get mad and rip ass. You do not have to pay the attorney in advance. He gets a very fair percentage of the back pay award once he wins your claim. No win- no pay. Will money cure PTSD? No, but it doesn't hurt. In my case, it has greatly started me on the path to better mental health.

PTSD Fact Sheet: Frequently Asked Questions

I no longer have the stress of worrying about money, or dealing with the suck holes from the bank trying to take my home and farm or appeasing a college punk at a job, that walked in and got the boss job with no industry experience. I spent a year on my farm and began to decompress. I have had horrible anxiety attacks since my time in the Army.

1. Facing PTSD: A Combat Veteran Learns to Live with the Disorder.
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4. Living with post-traumatic stress disorder: wives' and partners' stories - Telegraph;
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I started with one or two a year in my younger days and progressed to upwards of four per month in my latter years. I get true spinning with profuse vomiting and am incapacitated for 48 hours during an attack. These have greatly reduced with my having the ability to stay on my farm and have control of all of my time, when I need to, without fear of loosing a job and all of the stress that goes with that.

I am beginning to get a handle on my issues, on my own. I am slowly developing my own coping mechanisms. I have stopped the 8 to 10 beers a day habit for starters. I started going to American Legion meetings and hanging out with other guys like me. I am not much for crowds but this crowd is a barrel of squirrels like me. I look forward to the meetings. It is good to be around guys that have been there. Luckily, I had role models growing up who had been there. One was my Uncle Woodrow. Woodrow had severe PTSD but was able to function. He retired early while still young, was very financially stable and stayed home, when he needed to, as long as he needed, and would get back out when he felt better.

Woodrow was a Marine Infantryman from to He fought at Guadalcanal, Okinawa, and Iwo Jima. He was in a Special Weapons Group and was deployed, every time, prior to the initial landings. He was 92 when he died. I never saw him loose control until the very end. I asked him how he did it. He said, "I have come aparts, but I do it at home where nobody but my wife sees and I stay home, to myself, until I am better".

The basic secrets to success: Are these the answers to everything? No, but its a damn good start G. Helping others like us get better helps me get better. I want you to know that I won my case against the VA under very poor and daunting odds. They were sent directly to the VA. I had one record as proof of being at the Frankfurt PX during the bombing. I was denied on claims over and over and had to learn by trial and error.

Their basis for every claim denial: I sent them a demand for copies of all of my medical records. They produced a half-dozen battalion aid station medical records and one minor hospital record from to from Germany.

Military PTSD Books

I sent a second demand letter. Where are my hospital, troop medical clinic and dental records covering 15 years in service? They could not be produced! Lost my records and then rolled a grenade under my lawn chair. Turns out, all the records from before about are still in paper form and the VA uses a highly complex filing system to store them.

They take big stacks of paper, your medical records, and put a big red rubber band around them and put them in big piles, with other's medical records, that are stacked from floor to ceiling against the wall and from the wall to several feet out from the wall, and this has all been accomplished in a very long storage room.

Low-level FNG VA bureaucrat gets sent down to the paper pits of Hell and realizes that he has to dig through 65 tons of old stinky paper in an effort to locate veteran Joe Sh--bird's records. Dry your tears boys and girls, like my lawyer says, "There's an APP for that".

Veteran claims lawyers know this and rip ass in review hearings. My advice Brother Greg, go for it and get yourself some peace! Please excuse my drill sergeant flashback and the ramblings of a politically incorrect old grunt. I won for the same incident and you can too. My husband retired with 32 years of service and has PTSD. He does well for a while but suddenly he snapps, and starts to hide through the house.

Can you help me understand why is this happening? Faith, your husband's behavior is consistant with brain injuries from blast or blunt force head injury. Did he suffer any of these? If so, he needs to be evaluated by a qualified Nuerologist. Many times, the scans may not show results. Brain injuries are tricky. Do not let the VA or Tri-Care pukes blow you off on these tests. There are over 90, of us walking around, right now, with untreated Traumatic Brain Injuries.

I was wounded in two IED attacks in I was 22 years old. My symptoms did not manifest until in my late 40's and got much worse in my early 50's. I had multiple concussions in service from the IED's, two armored vehicle crashes and shooting missles. I take medication to help with symptoms. Before taking any medication from the VA, I see my civilian doctor for a referal to a specialist for a second opinion on the VA's prescription. I have to pay for these doctor visits but it is well worth it. In a couple of cases, my civilian doctor told me not to take what the VA had prescribed.

They don't call it "Candy Land" for nothing. Manifestation of symptoms, older in life, is very common. It has been continueously deployed since There are hordes of disabled veterans here. Talk to your husband during his calm periods and form a plan to see a Nuerologist or your primary care doctor. I did not seek help on my own. Luckily I had an uncle that had retired from the VA. I went to the VA and started to get treatment. Group PTSD counseling is good for me. Do not get into a group with a bunch of guys telling horror stories.

I got into one of those. I got my own horror stories and don't need to hear others. Where group is beneficial is when we can share methods as to how we cope with issues and symptoms. Over time, we figure out our own paths to coping. Input from others like us can help us to figure out our own path. Another uncle was a Marine from until in the Pacific War. He had the same symptoms as your husband. They first manifested when he was in his 60's.

He did short stays in the hospital and was good to go after a few days. Ready for all this to END! Hi bud, Please hang in there. It had been 3 years and 2 months now. So I hired me a lawyer and finally everything is moving rather quickly. If you need someone to talk to please e-mail at bpabilo bellsouth.

I will try my very best to help each one of us.

'You don't ever get over it': meet the British soldiers living with post-traumatic stress disorder

Anonymous, hiding behind no name, your political accusation about left wing liberals is misguided and out of place on this forum. There are many "left wing liberal" veterans suffering from PTSD, and for you to discount them is cowardly and a dis-service to their service. Shame on you for being so ignorant and narrow minded. Went to the gulf war with 3rd infantry division, stayed in bio hazard suit for days, had to take the pills and got a bio hazard shot, and was caught in a friendly fire incident when a private discharged his weapon in the Bradley fighting vehicle right next to me.

Then he pulled the pin on a grenade playing with it. I got into Kuwait and saw all the burned bodies in vehicles I ever want to see. I was out on perimeter security for so long in the pitch black I started imagining things that weren't there. I got home and became physically ill. And the nightmares started, insomnia, anger, anxiety and depression.

I did not trust anyone. Military Discounts and More! Parents of Deployed Soldiers. Send us your stories! What we're looking for A daughter's look at Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Quynn Elizabeth, Copyright Written by the daughter of a two-time Vietnam veteran in the year of her father's death and the escalation of the war in Iraq. In a time of war, what happens once a soldier comes home? Due to her father's experiences in war he struggled with Post Traumatic Stress, heart sadness and alcoholism all his adult life even though he didn't get diagnosed with PTSD until Available by book or audio CD.

After the War Zone. A practical guide for returning troops and their families. Coping with common reactions. The aftereffects of "battle" mind. PTSD - what it is and is not. Home, work, and community concerns. A highly practical, user-friendly guide to homecoming--including common after-effects of war zone exposure and how to cope--for returning troops and their families.

Two experts from the VA National Center for PTSD provide an essential resource for service members, their spouses, families, and communities, sharing what troops really experience during deployment and back home. Pinpointing the most common after-effects of war and offering strategies for troop reintegration to daily life, Drs.

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Friedman and Slone cover the myths and realities of homecoming; reconnecting with spouse and family; anger and adrenaline; guilt and moral dilemmas; and PTSD and other mental-health concerns. Ashley Hart II, Copyright We live in two worlds: The physical world around us; the world we can see, hear, touch, and feel, and the world within ourselves. These essays assist the veteran in learning how to monitor triggers, our cues, and balance the world within with the world we live in.

With harmonic balance, there is essential well being, validation, even joy. Paula Domenici, Copyright Parents of returning service members may sometimes feel that their voices are not heard. The media is saturated with stories about troops returning from deployment with mental health problems like post-traumatic stress, depression, and substance abuse. Some also return home with physical problems including traumatic brain injury, physical pain or more severe injuries like amputations.

Almost all returning service members experience reintegration challenges such as readjusting to family and community, finding employment or attending school. But rarely do we hear how parents are taking on the role of supporting their sons and daughters who have served our country. In countless ways these parents provide help—and when their military child suffers significant physical or psychological injuries, they may once again become their primary caretaker. For mothers and fathers and others in a parenting role, it can be overwhelming at times, and resources are limited.

This groundbreaking book acknowledges the significant contribution and sacrifice parents have made for their military children, provides strategies and resources that will assist them in understanding and supporting their son or daughter, and will validate their own personal experiences. Recommendations for helping them care for their returning service member are woven throughout the book, as well as education about the importance of taking care of themselves to help prevent caregiver burnout. Vignettes and reflections from parents who have had a child deploy offer a sense of hope and community.

Even in the best of circumstances, parents play an instrumental role in helping their sons and daughters successfully reintegrate after deployment. This book is a valuable resource for any parent who is seeking to better understand and support a returning military child while caring for themselves. To Iraq and Back. Cantrell, Chuck Dean, Copyright So how does it happen? How do we lose the loving closeness with those around us? And better yet, how do we re-gain what pain has robbed us of? Here you will find answers, explanations, and insights as to why so many combat veterans suffer from flashbacks, depression, fits of rage, nightmares, anxiety, emotional numbing, and other troubling aspects of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder PTSD.

Restoring hope for families of veterans with PTSD. Welby O'Brien, Copyright Chances are that if your loved one has seen war, he or she has PTSD at some level, and you who love your veteran will also be deeply and profoundly affected. Now here is a comprehensive, practical book solely dedicated to addressing the cries and needs of the loved ones.

A book that is geared toward your needs and issues—your cries. This book addresses a broad spectrum of issues and concerns and offers realistic wisdom from a wide variety of individuals who share from real hearts and lives. Welcomed by VA and other counselors, this is not just another book about PTSD; rather, it is a tremendous resource for families and loved ones who struggle heroically along with their vets to face the day-to-day challenges.

Once a Warrior always a Warrior. Charles Hoge, Copyright The essential handbook for anyone who has ever returned from a war zone, and their spouse, partner, or family members. Being back home can be as difficult, if not more so, than the time spent serving in a combat zone. It's with this truth that Colonel Charles W. In clear practical language, Dr. Hoge explores the latest knowledge in combat stress, PTSD post-traumatic stress disorder , mTBI mild traumatic brain injury , other physiological reactions to war, and their treatment options. Dave Grossman, Copyright This is the first time I have been taught how to deal with it.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder for Dummies. Mark Goulston, Copyright Cope with flashbacks, nightmares, and disruptive thoughts. Help your heart accept what your mind already knows — and overcome PTSD. A traumatic event can turn your world upside down — but just because you're still afraid doesn't mean you're still in danger. There is a path out of PTSD, and this reassuring guide presents the latest on effective treatments that help to combat fear, stop stress in its tracks, and bring joy back to life. Identify PTSD symptoms and get a diagnosis. Choose the ideal therapist for you.

Weigh the pros and cons of medications.

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Help a partner, child, or other loved one triumph over PTSD. Brannan Vines and Heather Hummert, Copyright Link to FREE e-book. More than , veterans who have served in Iraq and Afghanistan along with hundreds of thousands who bravely served in other wars and conflicts are now dealing each day with the impact of Combat PTSD post-traumatic stress disorder. It is a perfect way for veterans, loved ones, and those interested in supporting our nation's heroes and their families to begin getting an understanding of PTSD. It's authors, Brannan P. Vines and Heather A. Running with the Hounds.

David Wingfield, Charles Gillies, Copyright David Wingfield's story is both unique and universal. For 30 years he hunted cougar and bear with hounds in the mountains of Oregon, but once he had his prey cornered, he would rarely kill. He is unaware that his refuge, the wilderness, is also the stage upon which he will relive the past. His story is tragic, rich, and redemptive. It speaks to the burdens of memory that veterans of every war keep to themselves.

Stories of wounded women warriors and the battles they fight long after they've left the war. Kirsten Holmstedt, Copyright Life is tough for veterans, especially female veterans. They have much to deal with and much to heal from: Now more than ever these veterans are facing their problems head on. In this inspiring new book, Kirsten Holmstedt, trusted chronicler of women soldiers and veterans, tells the ups-and-downs stories of veterans struggling with the aftereffects of military service.

Introduces us to more than a dozen female veterans from all branches of the military, from Vietnam through Iraq and Afghanistan. Highlights where the military has succeeded and failed to help veterans. Tears of a Warrior. A family's story of combat and living with PTSD. Anthony Seahorn, Copyright Tears of a Warrior: Are you able to describe five characteristics of a combat veteran who is suffering from trauma PTSD?

Tears of a Warrior is a patriotic book written about soldiers who are called to duty to serve their country. This is a story of courage, valor, and life-long sacrifice. After the cries of battle have ended, warriors return home to face their physical and mental challenges. Some who made the supreme sacrifice return home in a box draped in the American flag.

Those more fortunate, often scarred for life, try to establish a new beginning for themselves and their families. Unfortunately, for many veterans and their families, life will never be the same. Society, overall, is simply too far removed from the realities of combat and a world filed with atrocities to truly comprehend or appreciate the experiences of returning veterans. If we send them, then we must mend them. Love and loss in an era of endless war. Author, Yochi Dreazen, Copyright For decades, brave veterans pushed for recognition and treatment, and spoke out about the intense struggle of PTSD.

Today, the media focus on veterans returning from Afghanistan and Iraq with PTSD has greatly increased the awareness among the general population. New research is being conducted, largely funded by the Department of Defense. Awareness is growing for our nation's combat veterans with PTSD. But more needs to be done; these veterans stand alongside millions of ordinary civilians with PTSD.

What is PTSD?

In fact, millions of ordinary Americans and people all around the world are living with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Many veterans struggle to integrate back into society upon returning home from combat; they may feel misunderstood and that "no one could possibly understand how I'm feeling without having experienced the horrors of war.

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